This was written the morning after I found out I was having twins. I thought I’d share the thoughts running through my head.
I’m in quite a state, not the kind that makes you act like a crazed cat woman of sorts but the kind that almost paralyses you mid-activity until you shake your head and then force yourself to continue on with what you were doing. I’m not sure how long this will last but I am guessing it could be quite a long time (perhaps more than nine months).
I am quite the planner. My busy brain vibrates when I have a new subject to think on and plan in detail. When I found out I was pregnant, I didn’t have to think much (after all, I have had Miss Possum so I would say I am experienced at pregnancy). Of course, being the planner I am, I still thought about how Poss would interact with the new baby and how having another little one might cause some extra work.
For some strange reason I kept worrying about the impending ultrasound. Will everything be normal? Will there be a heart beat? On that day, yesterday, Matt and I found out we were having twins… yep, twins! Yes, deadly serious! You could have knocked my husband over with a feather!
When telling my mother-in-law and my best friend that I was pregnant (before the ultrasound), the twin factor was brought up in jest but the thought really only skimmed the surface of my brain and bounced off immediately.
It is 2.27am and my brain won’t shut off. I can’t stop thinking about it. Nothing much I can do. I have to sit and let these two little children take me for a ride in my soon to be over-sized and over stretched tummy that will resemble a giant watermelon (the kind that wins awards!).
It is a curious feeling. I’m excited and I do feel special (only one in 80 Caucasian women have twins) but I also feel like I have a target pinned on my head. I know how hard it is to have one newborn baby, how on earth I will cope with two?
When I tell people, they seem genuinely enthusiastic but after their initial celebrations you can almost see a slight change in their facial features and you know they’re saying, ‘glad it’s you and not me.’
I’m going to stay positive about having twins, it’s a miracle in its own way and although I might focus on a beautiful picture of me holding two new-born babies sleeping away in my arms, I’m still very much aware that this will be the hardest thing I will ever do.
Were you ever given a surprise that kept you up at night? If you had an unexpected baby surprise, what went through your head? If you’re a mummy of twins, how did you feel when you found out the news?
Linking with shady Grace from FYBF. Come on over and join in too!